Damselinstress

 

 

 

 

As the rain falls down on the second day of the all renewed Spring Equinox refreshing the ground it touches, so does the need for me to write/touch my blog replenish.

Happy spring everyone!

It has been a long time since I've been here and given any updates at all, the last one being my return to Amsterdam a year ago.
Basically the same thing has applied for the past year, I've just been running around non-stop, which is another reason why I didn't post anything.

I felt drained.
Drained by everything.

 

My job, which I had instantly. The fact that I tried to quit said job in October, but couldn't leave until yesterday. My mental health which has been a wild rollercoaster ride. Balancing family life and spending time with my boyfriend. Trying to combine said things with streaming and trying out some D&D games with friends.

 

 

Luckily yesterday was my last day at work and as the earth is waking up and starting to bloom, so will I.

Big plans are on the horizon with me quitting and taking a month off to become myself again.

For the past year or so I've just put myself aside to make money in a job I knew I didn't enjoy, but was familiar. I'm over that. I've started taking driving lessons back in September(?) so I can get a job out of town and move out. It is too expensive to live in Amsterdam so I'm planning on doing a study in HR which is on Saturdays in Amsterdam, so I'll still see my parents at least once a week.

December has been a rough month for me.

On the 16th of December I took a fall and managed to get a big wound on my leg which caused me not being able to drive for december/january, and it'll always be a scar. It started to get infected because of how the nurse taped it off. The liquid/dirt coulnd't escape. So it took forever to somewhat heal and the pain still isn't completely gone.

 

On the 27th of December the little kitten (Joe) that I got for my birthday passed away. We're still not completely sure what happened and it's heartbreaking. I miss the little bugger.

 

January and February weren't the best start of 2019 either since I got the flu both times and was knocked out for 2 weeks each month, in February being certain that death was upon me after having a 41 degree fever for 3 days in a row.

And here we are in March, turning into April and all seems to be going okay.

I'm planning on sticking to good vibes only.
For my health, both mental and physical to stay okay and keep working on getting better.

In this month I will try to go out more, physically do more things like go for walks and work out.
Eat better, try to keep my bad days in check.
Focus on things that make me happy like wandering through the forests and taking photographs of the little flowers that are blooming. Spending time with my family and boyfriend and go explore places we haven't been before.
Maybe pick up a new hobby or two.

I want to use this month to my advantage, to replenish my energy, to nurture my need for creativity and exploration and to actually rest.

So thats my update on the past months. I hope this explains why I haven't been posting but like I said, I'm reloading the fuel tank and hopping back on!

Until next time, friends. ❤